A Teen Girl’s Survival Guide

by Sue Scheff on Jan 25, 2012


It's not always easy having a good mom and daughter relationship.

Being a mother of a daughter I know firsthand that raising a teenage girl can be a challenge.  Though my daughter’s teen years are a decade behind me, I listen to parents today and I sympathize with the extra burdens they have to endure with the added pressures of technology.  It is not easy.  The one common denominator that doesn’t change is most girls always feel they are never pretty enough, thin enough or fit in.  This needs to stop.  Where does all this low self-worth stem from?  As a parent,  many of use always try to build out kids up – however peer pressure can be so strong.

Here is a fantastic guest post that I think parents will benefit from:

Just Mom and Me: A Teen Girl’s Survival Guide

Mom and daughter relationships are very complicated and multifaceted. Some of them are the best of pals and communicate with each other regularly. Some are forever in the combatant phase. There are some who even steer clear of any kind of clash. But it can be stated without an iota of doubt that there is a whiff of all these traits in almost all relationships.

The million dollar question here is for the mommies, “how to raise your darling daughters into influential girls who are self-confident?” they become adept at making constructive choices regarding their own lives and execute productive actions for others. In spite of being normal girls with their little insecurities, they have a strong will and feel all right about themselves. You should know that these girls will mature sensibly and lead a worthwhile and satiated life.

Acknowledge your family’s most valued ideals

It is very essential to mull over your family ethics and contemplate upon the means by which you will put across these values. Be sure to include suitable examples to corroborate your message in the most appropriate manner. For this you have to constantly keep a check on instances in your daily life to exemplify these ideals you want your daughter to imbibe.

Persuade your daughter to resolve her own issues before settling it yourself

You have to coach your daughter to make her own decisions. She has to be independent and develop her own aptitude to deal with situations. Tell her to deliberate upon more than two approaches to deal with the circumstances and then inquire about likely consequences. You should convince her to make her own decisions for the very dilemma. It is okay even if you do not see things the same way; at least now your daughter has a feeling of control over her life.

Do not let her accomplish by magnitude, creates trouble

Try to make your daughter toil and excel at one thing at a time. Do not become hasty in trying to make them into little mechanical multi-taskers. Yes, this is an extremely competitive world and the motto of survival of the fittest is “the thing” to follow. But give your daughter some space and let her follow her own interests. You are there to guide her of course. Do not register her in infinite activities like dramatics, soccer, art, music etc. the belief that self worth is acquired by who you are and not what you achieve.

Make your daughter work together with other girls

If your daughter works jointly with other a girl of her school and solves her predicaments together, she will excel later in taking big risks and tackle many trials and tribulations in life. Working together makes them have an unbelievable sense of achievement and feeling of proficiency. All this is good for your daughter and good for you in the long run. So the bottom-line is inspire your daughter to take part in team-building activities where everyone works cooperatively to provide solutions to their problems.

Let your daughter be aware of the fact that you love her because of who she is

Do not be over fixated about everything your daughter does. She needs her own space just like you do as a mother. Keep encouraging her to have good habits but never obsess about it too much. It is alright if she takes her own time, everything does not happen overnight. But, show a positive reception for her individuality. Do not keep cribbing about her weight or her looks as she first needs to recognize her inner self. You need to deflate the thought that beauty is just about your appearance. Over obsession about the physical appearance will definitely lead to a lot of insecurities in your daughter’s life.

So, remember this rearing a girl up can be very thrilling and stimulating. Both of you can work it out together and enjoy so many things together. Maintain this bond even when she grows older. She will appreciate it for sure and you will always cherish it forever.

About the author: Alia Haley is a blogger and writer. She loves writing on topics related to wedding, health and luxury. Beside this she is fond of bags. She recently shared an article on designer baby clothes. These days she is busy in writing an article on Teeth whitening kits.

Join me on Facebook  and follow me on Twitter for more information and educational articles on parenting today’s teenagers.

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Filed in Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Teen Self Confidence, Teen Self Esteem with Comments Off

Teen Self Esteem: Build Your Teen’s Self-Esteem Early

by Sue Scheff on Feb 25, 2011


Self-esteem, confidence, feeling good about yourself etc… All of these are very important to helping your teen make good decisions for their future.  Here is a fantastic guest post that I truly believe parents need to take very seriously.

Teen Self Esteem can promote a positive future.

You have been saving for your teen’s college tuition for more than a decade. You have kept him on track in his studies. You have ferried him to countless soccer meets and football games. You may feel like you’re doing everything you can to ensure that your children have bright and promising futures, but you still may have overlooked a crucial element: their self-esteem.

Self-esteem is not something that should be pushed aside. In fact, a healthy sense of self-esteem is much more crucial to your teen’s future than you may initially think. Self-esteem is a measure of someone’s confidence in his or her capabilities as well as his or her sense of identity. It allows people to determine what they can and cannot do. Those with higher levels of self-esteem tend to feel more confident about their capabilities and therefore are more willing to take on challenges and try new things. They also are more likely to be independent and motivated, which is good for teenagers because it will allow them to better tackle the rigors of academics and college life.

Those with lower levels of self-esteem, however, are likely to be nervous, uncertain, dependent, and unmotivated. This is because they lack a sense of security in their capabilities, and therefore are more unwilling to do anything where failure is a possibility. Alarmingly, research cited by the Counseling and Mental Health Center of the University of Texas indicates that low levels of self-esteem can also increase a teen’s likelihood of becoming involved in drug use. For young women, unplanned pregnancies are more prevalent for those with low levels of self-esteem. Low self-esteem also can lead to the development of depression or anxiety.

Unfortunately, teenagers naturally have lower levels of self-esteem because they are going through numerous life changes and facing many new and uncertain things. For example, the onset of puberty, having to navigate high school politics, and moving away to tackle college are all uncertainties that can cause many teens to feel unsure about who they really are and who they will become. The overall result of all these changes is a shaken self-esteem.

It is important for parents to guide their teens through this confusing period so that they may regain the self-esteem they need to get through it all unscathed. You can do this by encouraging your teen to take care of himself. Good physical health can do wonders for mental health and self-esteem, so when your teen seems to be feeling bad about himself, go for a brisk walk with him. This will help him to get his muscles moving and perk his spirit up, according to the U.S. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. You can also strive to praise him whenever he does something commendable, such as having a good soccer meet or receiving a good grade in class. The praise does not have to be over-the-top gushing each time. In fact, a simple, “Good job!” can improve a teen’s self-esteem dramatically.

All in all, parents can ensure that their teens have a healthy level of self-esteem by offering them support, love, and respect. This way, teens can develop a good sense of who they are and what they can do, leading to the bright and promising future you always wanted for them.

By-line:

Lauren Bailey, a freelancer who blogs about online colleges, contributed this guest post.  She can be reached via email at: blauren99 @gmail.com.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Filed in At Risk Teens, Mental Health, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Peer Pressure, Struggling Teens, Sue Scheff, Teen Health, Teen Self Confidence with 1 Comment