Teensavers: Home Drug Test Kits – Don’t be a parent in denial….
by Sue Scheff on Feb 04, 2012
Parent-Tested, Parent-Approved
I am asked almost weekly by parents about how they can drug test their teens. I am not a doctor and I can’t endorse any product that I haven’t personally used. I know many parents have used over the counter products from both Walgreens and CVS as well as have had their family doctors perform blood tests, if they have a cooperative teens (wink wink).
I was asked to share a recent press release with parents. Although I haven’t used this product, some of you may find it useful and may want to look further into it. I know these products are in high demand, and I also know a parent in denial is only going to harm your teen in the long run. If you suspect your child is using drugs, it is better to find out now, while you can get help. Don’t wait for addiction to knock on your door. Yes, addiction is treatable – death isn’t.
Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kit — #1 recommended by addiction specialists — now selling at CVS.com
Teensavers Diagnostics Inc. is proud to announce that CVS Pharmacy and CVS.com has added the entire family of Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kits.
“CVS.com and the CVS/Caremark family are absolute leaders in the home health care industry. Families rely on the CVS family for every day products and life saving prescriptions. We value the support that CVS.com has shown the Teensavers® family, including our family branded drug tests in their diagnostics category. We share the importance and enthusiasm for families looking to lead a healthy life,” said Teensavers Diagnostics Inc. President Steve Stahovich.
Teensavers Diagnostics Inc. created the Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kits with the family in mind. Government statistics show that 4,000 teens try drugs for the first time every day. 2,500 of those kids are experimenting with pills. Many parents are seeing the explosion of teen prescription drug use in our community. But they don’t know what to do about it. The Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kits can help detect possible opiate use. It can help deter kids from taking pills, prescribed for a legitimate patient, from the medicine cabinet to use recreationally.
“We are proud that parents can find our total family solution, from the same chain where they are getting their prescriptions. Just as any health ailment requires immediate attention, potential teen substance abuse requires the same immediate attention and care. Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kits provide more than a positive or negative result. Our complete kit helps parents understand through the entire process, whether it’s diagnosing the drug use, or finding the best solution for your family,” said Stahovich.
There are five different Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kits available on CVS.com ranging from a 1-panel (THC only) test to a comprehensive 12-panel test. The prices range from $16.99 to $39.99.
2011 Winner Parent Tested and Parent Approved
Stahovich says choosing the right test is based on alert and informed parenting. Stahovich says, “Choosing the right drug test kit not only depends on your family and the child’s exposure to drugs, but the drug culture of the community. It is critical for parents to be proactive by talking with other parents in the neighborhood, finding out about drug issues in the schools, and within the community. Some communities have marijuana and cocaine problems. We are seeing an explosion of prescription drug abuse across most of the country. Parents may want complete tests for popular pills. Proper home drug testing involves pro-active parenting”
The Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kit is 99.9% accurate, made in America, and approved for over-the-counter sales by the FDA. The test is endorsed by America’s Parenting Coach, Tim Chapman, a 30-year treatment veteran. The Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kit was recently named a 2011 “Top Products” Winner by Parent Tested, Parent Approved, one of the most reliable and valuable online resources for parents.
===Product Specs===
– 1-panel ($16.99) Marijuana (THC) test.
– 3-panel ($21.99), screens for Marijuana, Cocaine, and Methamphetamine.
– 5-panel ($25.99) screens for the previous three drugs, plus Oxycodone and Opiates.
– 7-panel ($29.99) screens for the previous 5 drugs plus Benzodiazepines and Ecstasy (MDMA.)
– 12-panel test ($39.99) is the most comprehensive Teensavers® Home Drug Test Kit. It screens for Marijuana, Cocaine, PCP, Opiates, Amphetamines, Methamphetamine, Barbiturates, Benzodiazepines, Oxycodone, Methadone, Ecstasy (MDMA), and Tricyclic Antidepressants.
# # #Founded by President Steve Stahovich, a long time recovery and addiction specialist, Teensavers Diagnostics Inc. (http://myteensavers.com) is an ally to parents who suspect their teen may be using narcotics. We are the latest generation in home drug testing kits, offering a total solution, and not just results. We are endorsed by America’s Parenting Coach, Tim Chapman, founder of Chapman House.
Tags: At Risk Teens, Drug Abuse, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, peer pressure, Struggling Teens, Substance Abuse, Teen Drug Abuse, Teen drug addiction, Teen Drug Use, Teen Help, Teen Help Programs, teen home drug test kits, Teen Issues, Teensavers
Teen Angry: Reasons It Can Escalate
by Sue Scheff on Feb 03, 2012
Speaking with parents on a daily basis, I hear a lot about how teens can go into a rage, especially when they don’t get what they want. It seems family values and respect for parents and authority has diminished in today’s generation. I am not talking about all families, but many that I speak with, they don’t understand where there once happy toddler went.
Here is a good guest post with five possible reason that can cause teen anger:
5 Ways to Make Your Teenager Angry
Any parent of a teenager knows that one of the main emotions associated with that age is, you guessed it, anger. In fact, most people simply refer to their teenager as an “angry teen” and write off those emotions as a simple fact of life during that age. While this is definitely true, it is also imperative to treat your teen with as much care and respect as you would any other loved one, even if they treat you with the opposite of care and respect, at times. As a parent, you can’t write off your teen’s anger. In fact, if you’re not careful, you run the risk of making them seriously angry at you, rather than simply angry at the world. Here’s how:
1. Don’t Listen to What They Have to Say
One of the most important things to do while your kids are teenagers is to try to foster and maintain communication. Even if your teen would rather walk home in the snow than talk to you about his day, you have to take advantage of any communication you can get. And, most importantly, when you do get the opportunity to communicate, focus less on what you would like to say to them and more on what they have to say to you. You could be so occupied with worrying about the next thing you think you should tell them that you can miss hugely important clues about your teens life and how he or she is feeling.
2. Tell Them They Are Just Being a Teen
Talk about being written off! And at the absolute worst time in life to feel that way, no less. Never, ever make the mistake of treating your teen like their opinions or emotions are invalid simply because they are going through their “teens.” There is nothing that will push your child away faster or make them feel more annoyed and insulted.
3. Don’t Practice What You Preach
You may feel like you can relax a little once your kids are grown up, without the worry of them repeating things they shouldn’t say or copying behaviors they shouldn’t be copying. It’s easy to feel like you can cut back on trying to provide an example. But, even if it doesn’t feel like it, your teen is still watching you and emulating your behavior. If you are constantly lecturing them about following through on their homework, you better take the trash out if that is one of your family chores or remove foul language from your vocabulary if you expect the same from them. If you are going to ask your teen to follow through on things they say they will do, you absolutely must set that example.
4. Make Them Feel Isolated
When your teen suddenly prefers to lock herself in her room, music blaring, rather than hang out with the family, it can be easy to just leave them alone up there and not bother. Once invitations have been rejected so many times, you can begin to feel like it would be better to stop bothering them altogether. However, your teen still needs to feel like a relevant and important member of the family, or else you run the risk of creating a feeling of isolation that could continue into the later teen years.
5. Don’t Prepare Them for Plans
This is another area where parents sometimes feel that it’s better to stay away than address an issue or upcoming plan with their teen. Things like letting them know that you will be going out of town in two weeks, or that you want to have a family movie night on Friday, are simple to throw on your teen last minute, especially when they act like they could care less. The truth is, in the moment, they probably don’t care. But that doesn’t mean that you should surprise them by springing plans on them last minute. Sometimes teens, just like anyone else, need a little time to mentally prepare for upcoming events, and being forced to do something without warning is a surefire recipe for a breakdown.
Byline:
This is a guest post by Kimberly Wilson. Kimberly is from accredited online colleges, she writes on topics including career, education, student life, college life, home improvement, time management etc.
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Tags: anger, Difficult Teens, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Problem Teens, Struggling Teens, Teen Anger, Teen Depression, Teen Help, Teen Issues, Teen Rage
Family Conflict: 10 Signs a Parent is Upset with their Teenager
by Sue Scheff on Jan 24, 2012
Raising teens today can be contentious and get your blood pressure boiling. The lack of respect towards parents and most authority is very disturbing in today’s society. I often say the sense of entitlement issue can be a large cause of today’s defiant teens. Either way, parents are struggling with kids that are literally holding parents hostage in their own homes.
Here is a great guest post by Barbara Williams:
Working as a nanny can be a rewarding and fulfilling job for people who love children. However, getting along with the parents can sometimes be a challenge. The important thing to remember is, no matter how much you love the children, the parents are the boss. You need to make sure they are happy with your work because the parents are ones signing your paychecks. It might not always be obvious that you’re doing something to displease them, so here are 10 signs a parent is upset with you.
- Not speaking – Some parents aren’t good at communicating their displeasure so they’ll give you the silent treatment. Instead of a light banter at the end of the day they’ll only answer direct questions with short terse statements. If this starts happening you better find out if you did something wrong or if they’re just having a bad day.
- Exasperated sighs – Another unspoken sign a parent is upset with you is the exasperated sigh. Nannies who hear this better be on their toes. You should probably find out what the parent is unhappy about.
- Facial expressions – It’s important for nannies to be able to read the parent’s facial expressions. A furrowed brow or tenseness around the mouth could be a sign you did something wrong.
- Schedule a talk – When parents tell you they want to schedule a little talk, you may be in trouble. They may say something about having to go over a few things or the need to reevaluate your duties. Uh-oh!
- Send you home early – Another sign you made them unhappy is when they send you home early for no apparent reason. This could mean they are so upset they don’t even want to have you around.
- Day off for no reason – Getting an unscheduled day off could seem like a good thing at first, but you might want to beware. This could mean the parents are reevaluating your position. They may even be scheduling interviews with other potential nannies.
- Unreasonable demands – Some parents will do just the opposite and start making unreasonable demands when they’re upset with you. This could be their way of punishing you for whatever misdeeds you’ve done.
- Exaggerated niceness – Some parents will express their displeasure by treating you with exaggerated niceness. This forced and fake kindness that is dripping with sarcasm is a clear sign they’re upset.
- Kids tell you – Of course kids don’t have filters on their expressions like adults do, so they are more likely to tell you when their parents are upset and why. Nannies can often rely on the children to let something slip if there’s a problem the parents won’t tell them about.
- They tell you – Of course the best way to find out a parent is upset with you is for them to tell you. It’s much better for them to let you know right away if you’re doing something they don’t like so you can rectify the situation.
Everyone handles conflict differently and some people are very uncomfortable with confrontations. They’ll do anything to avoid unpleasantness. The best thing to do is have good communication between both the parents and the nannies. It’s not good to let problems fester when they can re resolved quickly and amicably. Nannies should watch for these signs that the parents are upset and work hard to resolve the situation.
Source: Find a Babysitter
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Tags: At Risk Teens, Defiant Teens, Disrespectful Teens, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Problem Teens, Teen Help, Teen Issues, Troubled Teens, Wits End
Are You Raising Strong Children or Broken Adults?
by Sue Scheff on Jan 17, 2012
It is not a secret, raising children and especially teens today is not an easy task. With this, my special guest contributor, friend and colleague, Aurelia Williams, has written an article that I think many parents will benefit from. Starting with a firm and solid foundation can secure a better future…. read on…
What will your teen learn from their childhood?
Are You Raising Strong Children or Broken Adults?
Fredrick Douglas once said “It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.“ I don’t think that there is a caring mother out there that doesn’t want to see her child grow up to be a strong adult. Throughout childhood, there are many circumstances that arise that can either build the child up or tear him down. Over the years and throughout these circumstances, your child can either grow into an assertive, strong adult or an adult that is timid, broken and weak.
The world is filled with many influences that will be presented to your child that you will have little or no control over and those influences can affect your child. Children develop attitudes toward themselves and others as a direct response to the words, actions and the beliefs that people communicate to them. What do your words and beliefs say to your child? If you want your child to grow up to be strong, secure adult, you must give him a firm foundation.
As a mom, it’s perfectly natural to want to stand up for and protect your child, but there are ways that this can go too far. Many moms don’t want to see their child struggle with problems or fight battles with their peers, so those moms take it upon themselves to fight their children’s battles for them. While they may think that they are helping their child, they are actually crippling them and making them weaker in the long run. If moms keep jumping in to fight their kids battles, their children will grow up to be broken, weak adults.
It is important to know when and how to step up to or away from battles that our children face.
It is the parents’ job to assist children as they navigate through all the twists and turns that life is filled with. That means we must teach them how to handle problems and they must practice what we teach.
Here are a few steps you can take to raise strong children:
Set a great example – Children will copy you. Just as sure as a child can act out or repeat all of the negative things parents do, they will do the same with the positive things as well. If you want your child to be strong and assertive, be sure that you stand up for your beliefs and views, even if it means going against the grain a bit.
Positive Words and Praise – Positive words go a long way. Be sure to let your child know that you value people who speak their mind respectfully. Praise your child when you witness them exhibiting strong, respectful behavior. This works wonders to boost up their confidence.
Don’t Sugar Coat - Be honest with your child about the difficult issues they may face! Break things down to your child’s level so that they understand the hard issues. Talk openly to your child about the possible battles they may face. When it comes to the issue of peer pressure, help them to come up with ways to combat it. Use real life examples and role play in order to get the point across.
This issue of supplying our children with the tools that they need to be assertive, well adjusted and confident is important. The end result is that if you don’t learn when and how to step back, your child will not be prepared for the bigger issues that he or she will face as they grow up.
Aurelia Williams, Owner of Parenting My Teen
About the author:
Aurelia Williams, owner of Parenting My Teen has organized a totally free coaching class where she will share strategies with you that will help you know when and how to step into or step back from the battles your kids face. It is totally free and is chock full of useful information that you can use immediately! Sign up and perhaps there will be just one less weak, broken adult in the world because of it.
Tags: Aurelia Williams, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting My Teen, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Teen Help
Horizon Academy – Red River Academy – Specialty Boarding Schools or Not?
by Sue Scheff on Jan 12, 2012
Who do you trust behind the screen?
Troubled teens, teen help, struggling teens, at-risk teens, problem teens, difficult teens, boot camps, military schools, behavior modification, specialty schools, specialty programs, teen help programs, boarding schools, residential treatment centers, residential therapy, emotional growth programs, therapeutic boarding schools, wilderness programs, defiant teens, manipulative teens, disengaged from the family, family conflict, hopelessness, WIT’S END….
You have about reached your wit’s end when you are searching the web and typing in about every keyword you believe describes what you think you are looking for. Glorified websites appear – maybe some not so beautiful, maybe you want a Christian setting, maybe you think a good boot camp or have that traditional thinking of an old fashioned military school…. however you will soon realize this isn’t 50 years ago. There are legitimate residential therapeutic schools today and it is a parent job to do their research to be sure they find a safe and quality program that fits their individual needs.
After hours – days – even weeks (I have actually spoken to parents that have spent months) on the Internet, sometimes the confusion can deepen, which is why I did create Parents’ Universal Resource Experts.
With this – I am only sharing my own experiences…. and it has to do with the affiliated programs with the title of this Blog….
Are you confused yet? Looking for teen help and realizing this is a BIG BUSINESS?
So, your teen is driving your crazy. You are at your wit’s end. You have finally decided you need outside help. You have exhausted all your local resources. Local therapy doesn’t help, heck, you can’t even get your teen to attend. Your teen is failing in school, he/she is very smart yet doesn’t want to attend school and believe they know it all. Many say, “typical teen“, but as a parent, we know it is more than that.
Where did our good kid go? Good kids making bad choices – and they don’t need to be placed in an environment that will make them worse in my opinion – learn from what happened to me!
As a victim of the WWASPS organization – I am often called or receive many emails about our (my daughter and I) experiences with them. Obviously not pleasant. Though I am happy to say the program she was at, Carolina Springs Academy, which attempted to go through a name change to Magnolia Christian Academy (or School) depending on the day you Googled it, is finally closed – it has been rumored some of the staff is now at their affiliate program – Red River Academy.
Let me be clear for legal purposes – these are rumors – but if I were placing my child in program, I personally wouldn’t take any chances – and furthermore, Red River Academy is clearly named in the current lawsuit which is extremely disturbing with allegations of fraud, abuse, neglect and much more – (click here) that is current.
Then we come to Horizon Academy. Another alleged WWASPS facility. Why say alleged? Maybe they will deny they are affiliated – yet look at their staff, again, you will see they were once employed at other WWASPS programs. Jade Robinson was at the program in Mexico (named in that lawsuit with alleged abuse and neglect) Casa By the Sea, then went on to Bell Academy, which didn’t last long, and I assume is trying to continue at Horizon Academy.
So when the “sales rep” tells you that “Sue Scheff” is a disgruntled parent – I say – YES, I was – you put my daughter in a box for 17 hours, she was mentally and emotionally abused – food and sleep deprived – I was complete defrauded – and she also missed out on 6 months of education. None of which I had signed up for. Grant it, this was 10 years ago – a lot has changed – but those original owners haven’t – so in my humble opinion – I wouldn’t trust any of their programs with my pets….. BTW: I am the only parent to have defeated WWASPS in a jury trial.
Most of the other (many) lawsuits have settled out of court with silence agreements. I don’t have one, which is why I can still share my story – which is why I get slimed online – which is why their sales reps have all sorts of stories about me – including “the jury made a mistake” – neglecting to tell you I won the appellate court too. No one condones child abuse – period.
I have been called a crusader (and not in a flattering way) though I take it that way. I have made it my mission to find the better programs and schools, since I do know what it is like to be at your wit’s end. I know what parents need help. I am not against residential therapy, which brings us to many of my stalkers that were formally abused in programs that believe all programs should be closed down. That is being extreme – they are not a parent trying to save their child’s life and future.
I will share with you that there are more safe and quality programs than there are bad ones – it is just about doing your homework and research. Today you are more fortunate than I was – you have more access to information and you can learn from my mistakes and my knowledge.
Please – take 10 minutes to read my story and see the list of programs that are and were once affiliated with Carolina Springs Academy – and from there, you make your own choices for your child.
I had one parent that almost went to Red River Academy that actually said the sales rep said they could have their teen “extracted” within a few hours? Extracted? Really – is your child a tooth? Please don’t get rushed into a quick decision – this is a major emotional and financial decision.
My organization is Parents’ Universal Resource Experts – and no matter what those “sales reps” or the Internet fiction – I don’t own, operate or manage any schools or programs! We are about educating parents when they are looking for help for their at risk teen…. Don’t get scammed when you are at your wit’s end.
Oh – and when these “sales reps” send out these defamatory links about me – another FACT they neglect to tell you is I won the landmark case for Internet Defamation that awarded me $11.3M in damages for what was said about me online! Lies and twisted facts! Here is my recent appearance on Anderson Cooper.
This is strictly my opinion on my own experiences – you are free to make your choices…
Tags: Difficult Teens, Educational Consultants, Horizon Academy, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Problem Teens, Red River Academy, Struggling Teens, Sue Scheff, Teen substance abuse, Troubled Teens, Wits End
Problem Teens, Teen Help and Parents Searching the Internet
by Sue Scheff on Jan 09, 2012
When is enough - enough?
Second semester. Some teens have had enough. They don’t want to go to school anymore. They believe they know it all. It is easier to get a GED, after all, some of their so-called friend are doing it!
Your once happy, bouncing toddler that strolled into kindergarten, brought that artwork home for your refrigerator, and may have end participated in the school plays has now decided that hanging out with a new group of peers that are less than what you would have selected for them, is their thing….
As much as you are trying to ignore or just say it is a phase, you notice your teen is withdrawing from the family, failing in school, smell alcohol, maybe even marijuana, cigarettes, and overall have become a child you no longer recognize with a personality that is defiant and totally disrespectful the the family boundaries – what do you do?
Most parents try local therapy – which is a great first step, but when happens when therapy doesn’t work? You can’t be afraid to take that next step! A parent in a denial only harms your teenager. Don’t be held hostage in your home by your teen’s behavior.
Sending a child to a residential program/school is a major decision. It is not one to be taken lightly or to be decided on overnight.
Usually a teen’s behavior has been slowly escalating and a parent knows that deep down things are not getting better. As much as you hope and pray that things will change, this is only typical teen behavior, sometimes it just isn’t.
With drug use and substance abuse rising – more dangerous and deadly ingredients being used, such as spice and inhalants, parents have reason to be concerned. It isn’t your marijuana of generations prior – it is so much worse and in many cases – addictive and deadly.
If you have reached your wit’s end and now surfing the Internet for help, remember, anyone can build a website. Anyone can put up nice pictures and create great content. You need to do your due diligence.
Years ago I struggled with my own teenager. I was at my wit’s end. I didn’t realize what a big business this “teen help industry” was. Yes, my child needed help, but what we received was anything but that. My story is a cautionary tale – not one to scare you into not using a program, however on the contrary, you have to get your child help, but you have to do your research in getting them the right help.
You can do it without spending thousands!
Here are some quick tips:
- Your child is not for sale, try to avoid those marketing arms selling you a list of programs that are not in the best interest of your child’s individual needs.
- Always speak with an owner or director – Someone that has a vested in your teen’s recovery. Their reputation is on the line.
- Wilderness and other short term programs are usually nothing more than a band-aid that will fall off as quickly as the program lasted. They are expensive camping trips and in most cases the Wilderness program will tell you at about 4 weeks that your teen will need to continue on to a longer term program. What? Yes, now you go back to the research board and worse than that, your teen will be deflated when he finds out he/she isn’t coming home in 6-9 weeks as they were lead to believe – and they will be starting all over again with a new therapist – new schedule – and new setting. Don’t get caught up in this “shuffle.” Start and finish with the same school/program.
- The average stay should be about 6-9-12 months, depending on your teen. Anything less is probably non-effective. Anything more, you may be creating abandonment issues in my opinion.
- Do you really need an Educational Consultant? Absolutely not. You are the parent and no one knows your teen better than you do – with a few tips, you will be able to make some sound choices.
For more helpful hint and tips, please contact www.HelpYourTeens.com for a free consultation. After the ordeal I went through, I created this advocacy organization to help educate parents on finding safe and quality programs.
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Tags: At Risk Teens, Boarding Schools, Defiant Teens, Difficult Teens, Educational Consultants, Entitlement Issues, good kids bad choices, High School Dropouts, IECA, NATSAP, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Problem Teens, Residential Treatment Centers, Struggling Teens, Teen Help, Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Troubled Teens, Wits End
Holiday Blues aren’t just for adults: Check on your teens, their Facebook Status is a good place to start
by Sue Scheff on Dec 24, 2011
WHEN SAFETY TRUMPS PRIVACY.
“When will this end?”
“I hate my life”
RED FLAGS and parenting. Know them!
Facebook is the social hangout of the internet for all ages, but it is particularly true of teenagers.
Teenagers often are much more open about what they are thinking and feeling in this cyber environment than most older adults. Since teens experience many emotional ups and downs, it can be easy to dismiss most of their dramatic postings as nothing more than normal teenage drama. However, there have been too many instances in recent years when parents had wished they’d paid more attention to what their teenager had posted as their ‘current status’.
Here a few status updates parents should watch for and investigate further.
Know how your teen is feeling....It could save their life.
- I can’t take it anymore. Although, this could mean anything from homework overload to sibling irritation, it could also be a cry for help from a teen who is truly overwhelmed with life in someway. It is not a status update that you want to ignore. Parents should take the initiative and find out what prompted this entry.
- Text me. This may seem innocent enough, but, for some parents, it may be a signal that their teen may be trying to keep something hidden that needs to be in the open. Privacy and protection are always a fine line to walk with teenagers. Parents, however, should never hesitate to ask about the reason behind such a post.
- Really loaded right now. If your teen is high enough to make this post on Facebook without thinking about the fact that their parents might see it, there is drug or alcohol abuse going on. Ignoring these types of problems does not make them go away.
- Depressing song lyrics. Song lyrics are popular posts from teens. It may be what they’re listening to at the moment or a song that is running through their head. If the lyrics of the songs are continually negative and depressing, this could be an indication of the teen’s emotional state, as well.
- No one understands. This is a common feeling during teenage years, but it is also one that can develop into a true depressive state. Seeing this posted as your teen’s Facebook status should raise enough concern for their parents to pursue the reasons behind the posting.
- I hate my life. Again, this is not an unusual statement to come from a teen at different points in their adolescence, however, posting it as your Facebook status is similar to shouting it from the rooftops. It is always better to treat these statements seriously, than to ignore them as a simple impulse statement.
- Forgive me, Mom & Dad. This kind of post would be one that should require immediate connection with your child. If it doesn’t mention what they are asking forgiveness for, it may be a subtle plea for you to stop them from doing something terrible. Take this very seriously!
- You’re all going to die. In light of the terrible things we have seen happen in our schools, a teen who posts something like this should not be ignored. “I was just joking” is not an acceptable explanation for this type of post. A teen who posts such a statement publicly should expect inquiry from, not only his parents, but school and law enforcement as well.
- I wish I were dead. Never assume these statements are words only. Any type of suicidal expression like this should be taken very seriously. Many parents have had the misfortune of finding out that even a verbal statement can be an indication of suicidal thoughts. A public posting of that thought should be taken just as seriously.
- I hate my school. The key word in this status update is ‘my’. It doesn’t say ‘I hate school’, it is more specific than that. It would behoove the parents to find out what it is, about the child’s school, that made them post this statement, and what can be done to improve the situation.
Facebook status updates reach a lot of people, a parent of a teenager should definitely be one of those people who pays attention to what their child is broadcasting into cyberspace. It may be their way of trying to find out if anyone is really paying attention, and if anyone really cares.
Source: My ISP Finder
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Tags: At Risk Teens, Facebook status, holiday blues, Parenting, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Struggling Teens, Teen Depression, Teen Help, Teen Issues, Teen Sadness, Troubled Teens
5 Ways to boost your teens self-esteem
by Sue Scheff on Dec 21, 2011
Being a teenager is not easy. Many teens struggle keeping up with peer pressure and trying to figure out where they fit in. This can sometimes cause them to make not so great choices. However if your teen has good self self-esteem, they are more likely to make better choices. Enjoy this guest post and especially during the holiday “time-off” take the time to be sure your teen is feeling good about themselves!
Self-esteem is a delectate issue in your teen’s life. This is a time in their lives when they are changing mentally, physically and emotionally. It’s important to help your teen but also know that this something they can only control, all you can do is assist. Address the issue or issues your teen seems to be facing, whether its low self-esteem based on appearance or grades, you can help. Here are some ways to boost your teen’s self-esteem.
1. Volunteer- When you do something good for someone else it makes you feel better. Sign your teen up with a program or organization that he/she can help with. Whether it is helping once a week or once a month, the act of giving is crucial. Check out your local soup kitchen or animal shelter and get them started today. Not only are the people and animals benefitting but so is your teen.
2. Hobbies-Talk with your teen and see what activities interest them. This may require lots of talking and observation. Take note in their everyday activities and pick up on signs of when, how and what makes them smile. For example you can sign them up for painting classes or get them books on a topic they like.
3. Exercise- There are many studies that show, when a person exercise they are much happier. According to www.Livestrong.com, ‘Running is a great way to rev up your metabolism and increase your energy levels. Cross country skiing is the only physical activity that burns more calories than running. Running releases endorphins, the chemicals in the brain that make you feel happy; this is how the expression “Runner’s high” came about.’ So get them outside and active!
4. Remove Negativity: Be sure to support your teen in all he or she does. Keeping a positive and happy vibe in the home will make them feel good. Keep negative words like: ‘ugly and fat’ out of your vocabulary. You would be surprised to how much teens listen to what you say. Just because you should remove negativity doesn’t mean you stop parenting. Discipline when necessary but keep in mind in day to day life, remain positive.
5. Friends: Your teen’s friends have a huge impact on your teen’s life. Be sure that your teen is hanging out with the ‘right crowd’. A good way to assess this situation is to invite their friends over for dinner. You will be able to judge if you think they are helping or hurting your teen’s self-esteem. If they are helping, then great, invite them over more often. If their friendship is not benefitting your teen, be sure to promote the positive friends in their lives more.
Remember this is a sensitive time for teens and nothing can help a teen like a supportive and loving parent. Follow these guidelines and listen to your kids. Happy boosting!
Author Bio
Nancy Parker was a professional nanny and she loves to write about wide range of subjects like health, Parenting, Child Care, and Babysitting, find a nanny tips etc. You can reach her @ nancy.parker015 @ gmail.com.
PS: Adults can use these tips too! Thanks Nancy for sharing these tips!
Tags: Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, peer pressure, self-confidence, Self-esteem, Self-worth, Teen Help, Teen Issues, Volunteering
Sexting: What is it, and Should Parents be Worried?
by Sue Scheff on Dec 17, 2011
Online safety of teens and kids of all ages is a priority as well as cell phone safety. This brings us to a very hot topic which a guest writer has asked me to post his recent article to help parents understand how important it is to understand what sexting is and how they can take steps to help keep their children safe virtually.
Sexting has become a recent trend with mobile users, as nearly 40% of teens reporting sexting at least once or consistently. Sexting is when one person sends a nude, or sexually suggestive picture/text of themselves to another person or a group. The consequences of sexting range from nothing, to serious. For parents, the worries are real and dangerous.
Child Pornography
The primary concern for parents is sexting that involves suggestive photos, especially nudes. Several teens have been charged with ownership of child pornography. That’s because even if two students under age 18 are dating, possession of nude photos of individuals under the age of 18 constitutes child pornography. In some cases, teens who have snapped pictures of themselves have been charged with “manufacturing, disseminating or possessing child pornography.” Those receiving the pictures have faced, and been sentenced, to charges of possession. Convictions lead to life-long registration on sexual offender lists.
Digital World
Once the pictures have been taken, parents have more issues to worry about, namely digital records. After pictures have been taken digitally, they immediately enter a digital world where they can become permanent. One person can send the picture to another and so on until it’s been shared across the digital world. It can all start with one phone. With chat rooms and other websites, it’s easy for pedophiles and other predators to misrepresent age, sex, and location. Teens and kids are constantly connected to the web. Not only can those pictures make their way to illegal websites, they can also make their way to strangers.
Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, and other social media sites are like online directories for everyone and anyone. It can be easy anyone to assume a false identity. With a couple clicks on the phone, a picture gets into the hands of the wrong person.
Psychological Factors
There are many reasons why teens take part in sexting and most of them are a new take on the old world of flirting and courting. Many teens send the texts as flirtatious messages, to boost popularity, or because of peer pressure. They can also include forms of sexual harassment, or bullying.
The ramifications for of this are undocumented in terms of sexting, but the potential psychological issues of self-esteem are wide and concerning. Adolescents and teens are entering a stage of life where body-image and self-esteem are developing. Bullying, harassment, and derogatory comments can degrade and damage morale. The effects of this can last for years or decades.
By sexting, teens put their bodies out there to be judged and critiqued. While their bodies may be healthy, teens use any chances to tease or insult another, especially if it means a chance to elevate themselves in a social clique, or in popularity. The self-esteem issues created by pictures, or suggestive language, being misconstrued, getting into unwanted hands or from unwarranted comments, can devastate teens and lead to suicide.
Cautionary Steps
Beyond eliminating and forbidding the use of all digital devices, there are other measures that parents can take to protect their teens.
The first is establishing a good relationship. Studies consistently show that parents who foster good relationships with their children have more influence on them than the media or peer pressure.
A strong relationship makes it easier for parents to approach kids about sexting and its consequences. Being honest with children about the potential legal consequences, psychological factors, and personal ethics and morals behind sexting is a good way to help them understand its seriousness.
To instill that seriousness, parents should monitor their child’s activities and friends. Much of sexting in teenagers is caused by peer pressure or social interactions. Supporting them in making the right decisions, and spending less time from those who are sexting, may be the best way to keep them safe.
Special contributor: Steven Farrell is the administrator of ReversePhoneLookup.org, the best reverse phone directory online.
Tags: Cell Phone Safety, Cyber Safety, Internet Safety, Online Privacy, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Sexting, Texting
20 New Trends in Sex Education
by Sue Scheff on Dec 14, 2011
Parenting includes many sensitive talks with our children, however the birds and the bees still remains one of the most difficult for many parents.
Why?
It seems we are starting it a younger age than generations earlier!
Sex education isn’t necessarily something people like to talk about, but it’s certainly necessary. Without sex education (and often, even with), teens can get into trouble with pregnancy, abortion, STDs, and even AIDS, all of which can have a negative impact on their lives and future happiness. Awareness and education are important, but they’re not always the same. Sex education has changed considerably in recent years, with abstinence-only education, sex education for younger children, and more, so it’s worth taking a look at some new developments in the field. Read on, and we’ll discuss 20 new trends that are going on in sex education right now.
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Mandating medically accurate sex education
It seems like a no-brainer, but many states have recently enacted bills that would require medical accuracy in school sex education. We have to wonder what’s been put out that’s not accurate, but at least these states are working to get it right now. Typically, the educational programs are required to be in accordance with “accepted scientific methods and recognized as accurate and objective by professional organizations and agencies with expertise in the relevant field, such as the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the American Public Health Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists.”
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Teens aren’t learning about contraception before they have sex
Sexual activity is common by the late teen years with 7 in 10 teens engaging in intercourse by their 19th birthday. But many students who have engaged in sex report that they didn’t learn about contraceptive use before getting started. In a Guttmacher Institute fact sheet on American teens’ sources of information about sex, 46% of males and 36% of females reported that they didn’t receive formal instructions about contraception before having sex for the first time.
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Kids are learning about sex from outside of school
This is obvious to most, but the majority of sex education actually takes place outside of school. Kids learn about sex from porn, TV, and pop culture these days. Stars like singer Solange Knowles lend their time and image to campaigns that promote safe sex, and even death metal bands get in on the action.
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Sex education for younger children
Sex education can start as young as third grade, although that education doesn’t necessarily involve explicit sex explanations. For third graders in China, sex education starts in the form of a toilet tour, in which children get the opportunity to peek into the other gender’s bathroom to better understand the differences in their bodies and behaviors. Students also view presentations about sperm fertilizing eggs.
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Many sex ed programs are abstinence-only
According to the CDC, about 1/3 of sex education omits the use of birth control, engaging in the controversial abstinence-only sex education that has been both lauded and criticized. However, about 2/3 of teens got instruction in birth control before graduating from high school: about 62% of boys and 70% of girls. Research suggests that comprehensive sex education that includes both abstinence and birth control began to decline from 1995 to 2002 and has not changed much since then.
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Federal funding mandates prohibit educating students about contraception
Since 1997, the federal government has invested more than $1.5 billion into abstinence-only programs, which require schools to avoid teaching about birth control in order to receive federal funding for sex education. These programs must adhere to a strict eight-point definition of education, with the “exclusive purpose of teaching the social, psychological, and health gains to be realized by abstaining from sexual activity.” Critics point out that the eight-point definition is not created by “evidence-based, public health and social science research,” but rather, a values agenda put in place by Congress.
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Elementary schools are passing out condoms
Schools passing out condoms to students is not a new idea, but some schools are taking things a step further and making them available to virtually all ages. In Provincetown, Massachusetts, one school will allow students as young as first grade to get free condoms, as long as they listen to a talk about sex education beforehand. The program is a move to decrease teen pregnancy. While the superintendent recognizes that first graders and other young elementary school children probably don’t know what condoms are and won’t ask for them, parents are worried that just by having them available, students are going to get the message that it’s acceptable to have sex at such a young age.
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Almost all sex-ed programs teach about AIDS and STDs
Almost all students will learn about AIDS and STDs, a move that is smart for stopping the spread of disease. About 97% of teens report receiving formal sex education by the age of 18, and about 92% of boys and girls report being taught about STDs, including preventing infection with the AIDS virus. This may cut down on the spread of AIDS and STDs now and in the future among young people who are sexually active.
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Teen males will use more condoms if they learn about them
Although federal funding mandates abstinence-only education, research has shown that formal sex education, regardless of whether it includes information about birth control or not, leads to greater condom use among teen males. So even though teen males may not be educated about condoms, being informed about sexuality seems to increase responsibility. According to Condom Use and Consistency Among Male Adolescents in the United States, “the critical factor for male condom use and consistency is the presence of any formal instruction.”
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Schools are testing students on health and sex education
Washington DC public schools annually test student progress in reading and math, and now, they are testing what students know about sexuality, contraception, and drug use as well. This is a bold move in a city with some of the country’s highest rates of sexual transmitted diseases and teen pregnancies. Officials share that the test will fill gaps in what they understand about young people’s awareness and why they behave a certain way. According to Brian Pick, deputy chief of curriculum and instruction for DC Public Schools, “it paints a fuller picture.” Adam Tenner, executive director of MetroTeenAIDS, believes the new test is positive, pointing out that “what gets measured gets done.”
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States who denied abstinence-only funding typically have teen pregnancy rates under the national average
There is a correlation between abstinence-only education and high teen pregnancy rates. In 2005, states who did not receive federal funding for teaching abstinence-only education typically had teen pregnancy rates that were under the national average. Abortion rates also tended to be lower in those states, indicating that students with comprehensive sex education may have more favorable outcomes.
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Masturbation isn’t really discussed
Although abstinence is discussed as an option in virtually every sex education program, whether birth control is mentioned or not, masturbation is hit or miss. Some teachers believe that discussing personal or mutual masturbation can be beneficial to students who want to explore sexuality without the risk of STDs and pregnancy, but others believe that teaching students about masturbation, and mutual masturbation in particular, may just be a prelude to intercourse.
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Sex education curriculum often has distorted information
Parents and students trust sex education programs to teach accurate information, but according to Advocates for Youth, sex education curriculum often includes distorted information. A 2004 study by the House Government Reform Committee took a look at commonly used curricula and found that they contained unproven claims, subjective conclusions, and outright falsehoods, including the “facts” that “half of gay male teenagers in the US have tested positive for HIV,” “condoms fail to prevent HIV transmission as often as 31 percent of the time in heterosexual intercourse,” and “as many as 10 percent of women who have an abortion become sterile.”
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Sex education programs with both abstinence and contraceptive education can create favorable outcomes
Advocates for Youth points out that considerable scientific evidence supports the idea that sex education programs including both abstinence and contraception can help teens delay sexual activity, increase contraceptive use, and have fewer sexual partners when they start having sex. The group also believes that youth development programs that engage young people constructively in communities and schools are helpful. Specifically, Advocates for Youth identifies characteristics of effective curricula, including programs that last more than a few weeks, address peer pressure, and reflect the appropriate age, sexual experience, and culture of the students in the program.
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Virginity pledges
Some teens and young adults have begun to commit to virginity pledges, often as part of church programs. Studies have found that these pledges can delay vaginal intercourse, however, pledgers often replace it with other sexual activities including oral sex and anal sex, both of which do not reduce the incidence of sexually transmitted diseases. Some studies indicate that virginity pledges may reduce the likelihood of contraceptive use once pledgers engage in sex. The first virginity pledge program was created in 1993, by the name of True Love Waits, started at the Southern Baptist Convention, with now more than 2.5 million pledgers.
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Teens are having less sex
Although parents and concerned citizens worry that today’s teens are having more sex than ever, a CDC survey, Teenagers in the United States: Sexual Activity, Contraceptive Use, and Childbearing indicates that teens’ levels of sexual experience have decreased. The numbers of teens who have had sexual intercourse at least once have not changed significantly, and that number has been in overall decline over the last 20 years. As Examiner.com points out, that means today’s teens are less likely to be sexually experienced than their parents were as teens.
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Teens don’t learn about the connection between AIDS and anal sex
Researchers at the Bradley Hasbro Children’s Research Center discovered that anal sex is on the rise among teens and young adults. They say that girls are often persuaded to try anal sex to have sex without risking pregnancy or their virginity, but don’t understand the health consequences. Even students who can recite how you get AIDS may not understand how exactly it translates to their behavior, thinking that they can’t get AIDS because they’re not having vaginal sex. In fact, anal sex can be more risky for HIV infection, as tissue may tear and cause direct blood exposure to infected fluids. Lead author Celia Lescano remarks, “There is no doubt that teens lack information about STDs and the safety of different behaviors and they they are engaging in more sexual experimentation.”
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Some states leave sex-ed curriculum up to local school districts
In some states, sexual education curriculum is variable among different school districts, with differences in what is taught and how it’s presented. In Connecticut, for example, the state leaves it all up to local school districts, allowing them to decide what is taught about sex education. The state does, however, offer guidelines on what it believes should be taught, and all public school districts do offer at least basic health education for high school students, and state law requires school districts to teach about HIV. Bonnie Edmondson, a health education consultant at the Connecticut Department of Education shares, “It is a local control issue. The communities have a feel for what is best.”
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Teens want more input from parents
Although most teens are at an age when they are pushing their parents away on a regular basis, the fact is that they would like more input from their parents when it comes to sex education. In Baker County, Florida, teens don’t believe they’re getting adequate sex education from parents or teachers, and they shared that parents need to find better ways to discuss sex with their kids. Some teens pointed out that sex education is first and foremost the parents’ responsibility, and they need to find ways to make the topic less awkward to bring up. They also note that teens learn more about sex from their peers than their parents, and that’s not necessarily a good thing.
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The elderly are getting sex education as well
Schoolkids aren’t the only ones learning about sex these days. The elderly are finding value in sex education as well. In Malaysia, one state is providing sex education for the elderly to stop rising divorce rates. Family development foundation head Mohamad Shafaruddin Mustafa notes, “Many elderly couples sleep in separate bedrooms and are not intimate. This is unhealthy as they can still have vibrant intimate relationships, especially with all kinds of therapy and health supplements now available.” With sex education, elderly couples can better learn how to reconnect and enjoy their sexual relationship together.
Source: Best Colleges Online
Tags: HIV Awareness, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Sex Education, Sue Scheff, Teen Health, Teen Help, Teen Sex Awareness, Teen Sex Education
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