Sue Scheff: Embrace School Climate and Make Your School and Community a Safer Place for Kids and Teens
by Sue Scheff on May 16, 2010
No matter where you are in our country, school climate is critical in our childrens lives. Today with the headlines ripping with text rage, text threats and hit lists, bullying, beatings, teen bomb scares and more, there has never been a more crucial time to educate parents, teachers, schools and students about prevention of school violence and the need to learn about healthy living.
School Climate is an educational resource that is working diligently to bring together everyone to benefit our communities and school districts.
About School Climate:
Our goal is to promote positive and sustained school climate: a safe, supportive environment that nurtures social and emotional, ethical, and academic skills.
CSEE is an organization that helps schools integrate crucial social and emotional learning with academic instruction. In doing so, we enhance student performance, prevent drop outs, reduce physical violence, bullying, and develop healthy and positively engaged adults.
For more than a decade CSEE has worked together with the entire academic community-teacher, staff, school-based mental health professionals, students and parents-to improve a climate for learning.
We help translate research into practice by establishing meaningful and relevant guidelines, programs and services that support a model for whole school improvement with a focus on school climate.
Join School Climate on Facebook and follow them on Twitter. Also follow them on through BullyBust.
Is your school safe? Do the students feel safe? Measure your school climate today! Click here.
Be an educated parent, you will have safer and healthier teens. Read more.
Tags: Bullying, Community Service, Parenting, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens Online, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, School Climate, School Violence, Sue Scheff, Teen Help
Sue Scheff: Teens Harassing Teens on New Website
by Sue Scheff on Apr 30, 2010
Have you visited Facebook lately? One group on Facebook is people, especially parents of teens and tweens, that have banned together to Boycott Formspring.me. With nearly 7500 fans, considered “likes,” these people are letting their concerns be heard.
As bullying is escalating in our country, cyberbullying is growing rapidly. With sites like Formspring.me, it only fuel the fire of cyber sticks and stones that burn and scar emotionally.
Recently Danah Boyd wrote an excellent article after doing research on this hot topic amongst parents of teens and tweens. Titled, Harassment by Q&A: Initial Thoughts on Formspring.me, Danah’s hypothesis is the following:
Teen girls engaged in responding to crass questions are using Formspring to prove that they’re tough to their peers. Teen boys and girls are throwing curve balls at their peers to see how much they can handle, primarily using mean-spirited and sexualized language. While staying tough is clearly part of the game, it’s also clear from my informants that the harassment is playing a psychological toll. I’ve talked to numerous parents who are shocked by how their children’s peers are using this site and in most cases, knowledgeable parents demand that their children delete their profiles at once. One parent told me the story of her daughter’s friend who didn’t want to take her profile down because it would “look weak.” This girl and her mother got into a huge fight over Formspring because the girl didn’t want to let on that she cared about what people were saying about her on the site. I can’t help but think about my own teen years and my attempts to look unfazed by swirling rumors while throwing up in the bathroom when no one was looking. – Read her entire article here.
As a parent, do you know if your teen or tween is engaging in Formspring.me? Many parents are outraged over this new form of harassment, it seems clear it is just another form to teens to emotionally scar teens. It is time this stops.
Boycott Formspring Group states the following:
As many of you probably know, many people are bullied, harassed, and abused on this site called Formspring. Formspring is nothing but negativity. All it does is make people upset due to insults and harassment. Don’t let formspring take another life. Join the movement. Delete yours now.
Be an educated parent, you will have safer teens.
This article is based on the opinion of the author. Watch video and read more.
Tags: Bullying, Cyberbullying, Formspring.me, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Teen Help
Sue Scheff: Dangerous Games Teens Play – Be an Educated Parent
by Sue Scheff on Apr 08, 2010
Children are “strangling” themselves to get high and then sharing the videos on the Internet, campaign and advocacy groups have warned.
The Choking Game. Is not a game you want any teen or child to play. Parenting today can be a challenge, however if you are not kept inform on the games teens can play, you may not be able to educate and protect your children from the consequences.
It is true, many children need to learn from their mistakes, and learn how to pick themselves back up again, but when it comes to dangerous games that could potentially kill them, you need to talk to your teens about these dangers.
Space Monkey. Just another trendy name for what is also called, The Choking Game. Nicknamed “Space Monkey,” the practice involves squeezing the carotid arteries in the neck to restrict the flow of blood to the head. Releasing the pressure leads to a sudden rush of oxygen to the brain, giving a feeling of euphoria.
What is the Choking Game?
It’s not a game at all-just an act of suffocating on purpose.
Adolescents cut off the flow of blood to the brain, in exchange for a few seconds of feeling lightheaded. Some strangle themselves with a belt, a rope or their bare hands; others push on their chest or hyperventilate.
When they release the pressure, blood that was blocked up floods the brain all at once. This sets off a warm and fuzzy feeling, which is just the brain dying, thousands of cells at a time. – G.A.S.P.
In Florida The Dangerous Behaviors Foundation is a non-profit organization targeted at educating and bringing awareness to this deadly game and dangerous behaviors of teens. DB Foundation is community based and community driven to offer their own experiences, tragic losses, and knowledge firsthand. Sadly, learning the hard way about this heartbreaking game kids are playing and sharing it with others helps people heal from their own horrific experieces. Learn more at www.chokinggame.net.
Be an educated parent, you will have safer and healthier children.
Take the time to explore, read and learn at both The DB Foundation and Games Adolescents Shouldn’t Play (GASP).
Tags: At Risk Teens, Choking Game, Parenting, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens Online, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Space Monkey, Sue Scheff, Teen Games, Teen Help, Teen Issues
Sue Scheff: Parenting 2010 (part 1)
by Sue Scheff on Dec 14, 2009
Part 1 of a 5 part series for a “virtual make-over” in 2010!
As quickly as the holiday’s have come upon us, New Year’s is literally weeks away. What will your resolution be as a parent?
Parenting teens today is extremely challenging. With all the technology, cell phones, i-Phones, i-Pods, and much more, how can parents keep up?
As many times as we hear we need to be ten steps ahead of our kids technically, it seems almost impossible.
Here is part one of a five part series. As a parent you need to consider this New Year’s resolution and take the time to make a difference in your child’s life – technically speaking right now.
“Time” is the key word, and you never know what you will learn from your child in this process. This is a resolution every parent needs to consider, and honestly can’t afford to ignore in today’s hi-tech society.
Part 1 - Sit down with your child, and especially those with teens, and review each others social networking sites. Is there questionable photo’s there? Are there words that are less than appropriate? Are there friends that may not be the best to associate with?
- Explain why the photo’s are not appropriate.
- Talk to your child about why certain language is questionable and people may see you in a false light.
- Give examples why a certain person may not be the best to associate with.
Children and teens need to understand what the post today can haunt them tomorrow. Teens need to understand the consequences of college recruiters that will Google you and may exclude you from consideration due to a questionable online presence. Children need to understand that they are vulnerable to Internet Predators and how to block contact from potential monsters that lurk online.
Part 2 – New Year’s Resolution for parents: Create a family Blog for you and your teens.
Part 3 – Learn to monitor your children and teens online.
Part 4 – Books, resources and services for parents to learn more about online information.
Part 5 – T.A.L.K. Learn to keep those lines of communication open both online and off!
References for parents to review: Social Web Tips for Teens, Chatroom Safety Tips, Cell Phone Safety Tips, Social Web Tips for Parents
Don’t forget to subscribe to my articles to be alerted when updated information on parenting and Internet Safety is posted.
Tags: Blogging, Cyber Safety, Family Safety, Internet Presence, Internet Safety, New Year's Resolution, Online Safety, Parenting, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Virtual Presence
Sue Scheff: Internet Safety and your Teens
by Sue Scheff on Nov 16, 2009
One of today’s largest challenges for parents keeping up with their kids technology. Whether you have teen that is wandering through areas of the web they shouldn’t be, or kids that are landing in chatrooms that are extremely risky, as a parent you need to be ten steps ahead of them.
Here are some great articles, tips, resources and more to help you be informed about parenting in the digital age.
Internet Safety and Guidance Counselors
Click here to learn more about the author.
Also on Examiner.com
Tags: Cyber Safety, Cyberbullying, Internet Safety, Online Safety, Parenting, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff
Sue Scheff: Ungrateful Teens
by Sue Scheff on Nov 15, 2009
As part of my continuing series of Dr. Michele Borba’s insights and sneak peeks inside her Big Book of Parenting Solutions, we will review signs and symptoms of an ungrateful child.
•Bad manners: needs constant reminders to say thank you or show his appreciation
•Envy: wants what others have, envies others’ possessions
•Lack of appreciation: takes for granted your daily kind and thoughtful gestures
•Huge sense of entitlement: feels he deserves to have luxuries or privileges
•Dissatisfaction: always seems to want “more,” better,” or “new”
•Materialism: values only material things, brand names, or the “latest”
•Self-centeredness: is unwilling to reciprocate with gifts or kind acts to others
•Ungraciousness: acts disappointed with presents, blurts out “I didn’t want this”
•Thoughtlessness: doesn’t consider other person’s feelings or the thought or effort that went into her gesture
THE SOLUTION:
Step 1. Early Prevention
•Model gratitude. Kids learn by seeing others display appreciation in everyday, unplanned moments. How often do your kids see you convey your appreciation with hugs, words, or small notes to others? (Much more on page 226 in Big Book of Parenting Solutions).
•Set limits. Having too much “stuff” squelches appreciation. (Read more on page 226 in Big Book of Parenting Solutions).
Michele Borba offers three more beneficial steps with much detail in her Big Book of Parenting Solutions. These are some sneak peeks and hopefully you will see the value in owning a book of this magnitude in your parenting library.
Next sneak peek: The Seven Deadly Parenting Styles - don’t miss this!
For those that don’t have time to read, this is the perfect book for you since it is not the type of book you just sit down to read. As parenting questions come up, you can go straight to the index and find the page number. Immediately you will see the pages divided by boxes, quick tips and advice and easy to read and understand resources. Did I mention she also gives you proven research and statistics?
Previous sneak peek, Gratitude Recipes: Big Book of Parenting Solutions.
Click here for more articles on parenting. Don’t forget to subscribe to my latest articles, and you won’t miss the sneak peeks inside this valuable book as well as other great tips, resources and stories.
Reminder: Holiday Safety Tips.
Also on Examiner.com
Tags: Entitlement Issues, Michele Borba, Parenting Books, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Teen Entitlement Issues
Sue Scheff: Study Says Teens Hanging Out Online “Is Not a Waste of Time”
by Sue Scheff on Oct 22, 2009
Denise Witmer, one of my favorite Parenting Teens Experts, posted a Press Release that parents should take the time to read. It will give you another aspect of today’s tech world and our teens! This is definitely an interesting study and one we can all learn from.
Study Says Teens Hanging Out Online “Is Not a Waste of Time”
Source: John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation
Results from the most extensive U.S. study on teens and their use of digital media show that America’s youth are developing important social and technical skills online – often in ways adults do not understand or value.
“It might surprise parents to learn that it is not a waste of time for their teens to hang out online,” said Mizuko Ito, University of California, Irvine researcher and the report’s lead author. “There are myths about kids spending time online – that it is dangerous or making them lazy. But we found that spending time online is essential for young people to pick up the social and technical skills they need to be competent citizens in the digital age.”
Tags: Cyber Safety, Internet Safety, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teen Help, Teen Issues
Sue Scheff: Chat Room Safety for Your Teens
by Sue Scheff on Oct 15, 2009
Does your child, teen or do you venture into “Chat Rooms” online? Chat rooms are among the riskiest places on the Net for children and teens. Most Internet Predators are lingering waiting for their next victim in a variety of chat rooms. Don’t allow it to be your child.
As a Parent Advocate, I encourage all parents to take the steps to educate your children about cyber safety with a strong emphasis on chat room safety. October is National Cyber Safety Awareness Month, which is a reason for you to set aside time to sit with your kids and discuss what lurks online.
Here are some great Chat Room safety tips from Connect Safely to share with your family:
Remember that what you say in a chat room or instant messaging session is live — you can’t take it back or delete it later.
Don’t say anything you wouldn’t want the public to know — this includes your full name, your address, phone number of other personal information.
Don’t get together with someone you meet in a chat room. If you must, meet in a public place and bring along some friends.
Don’t reveal your actual location or when and where you plan to hang out.
Choose a nickname that’s not sexually suggestive and doesn’t give away your real name.
If someone says or does something creepy, block them and don’t respond.
Just sign out if the topic turns to sex. That can often lead somewhere you don’t want to go.
For more info: Connect Safely,iKeepSafe, ReputationDefender/MyChild, Google Bomb Book, Love Our Children USA, Cati Cares.
Also read on Examiner.com
Tags: Chat rooms, Cyber Safety, Cyberbullying, Internet Predators, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teen Chat rooms
Sue Scheff: Internet things your child should never know
by Sue Scheff on Oct 03, 2009
October is National Cyber Safety Awareness Month.
It is a perfect time to review some great tips for parents, teens, kids, small business owners and everyone. The Internet today is our new information highway.
It is important that we are educated on the power of the Internet as well as the pitfalls of it. The World Wide Web has been considered an educational tool, however like with many things in life; there can be a dark side.
Take the time to become aware of tips to keep you and your family safe in cyberspace.
I will be bringing tips through this month from different sources; all are targeted to helping you be more secure while online.
Here is some advice from Nurse Practitioner Schools:
Internet Things Your Child Should Never Know
Strangers online are okay. Remind them that a stranger on the internet should be treated like a stranger in real life. If ignoring them doesn’t work, they should tell a parent. Check out NetSmartz for more.
Posting a picture is okay in certain situations. Even an innocent looking picture, once it is out there, can be changed to do all sorts of damage. Encourage your child to post a picture of themselves as a favorite cartoon character as a safe and fun option.
It’s okay to chat with other children online. Because anyone can pose as anyone else on the internet, chatting and other activities still fall under the no stranger rules. If you’re child does chat, make sure you know who they are chatting to both online and in person.
What type of monitoring software you use. If they can Google it, chances are a savvy child will be able to find out how to disable it. Keep software boxes and receipts out of sight so the child cannot find out that way, either.
If they are being monitored. Children who know they are being monitored may wait until they have access to another computer to do the stuff they know they shouldn’t be doing. If you catch your child doing something you don’t approve of, talk with them instead of blowing up at them.
Your passwords. Because adults often use the same passwords for different sites, telling your child even one password can open the door to them accessing every online account you have. If you have a family account on a site such as Flickr, have the whole family come up with a password together.
More advice and tips will be coming soon. Don’t miss this month of Cyber Safety Awareness. Keep in mind, an educated parent is a prepared parent which leads to safer children.
Tags: Cyber Safety, Cyberbullying, Internet Law, Internet Safety, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff
Sue Scheff: Online Fools – Be an Educated Parent in Cyberspace
by Sue Scheff on Oct 02, 2009
A new study finds that what kids do online and what parents think they’re doing are not always the same… During National Cyber Safety Awareness Month it is time for parents to take the time to find out about what their kids are doing online. Where do they visit, surf and chat with? Are they posting on YouTube? Do they understand the consequences when it comes to college application and job applications? Most are using Search Engines to research their potential candidates. Your kids/teens need to understand, what they post today can haunt them tomorrow! Teach them – educate yourself and become proactive online parenting!
Source: Connect with Kids
Online Fools
“With 70-thousand videos a day being uploaded to YouTube, it’s kind of hard to stand out. So the kids find they have to keep pushing the envelope – to do something more outrageous – to be able to get attention from that.”
– Steve Harmon, Chair, Division of Learning Technologies, Georgia State University
A new study finds that what kids do online and what parents think they’re doing are not always the same. One example: 29 percent of parents say their kids make fun of teachers online, but almost twice that many kids say they complain and ridicule teachers.
For instance, teacher baiting: students pick a fight with a teacher and record it on their cell phones. The video is then posted to the Internet.
In one such video, a clearly enraged male teacher screams, “When I tell you to stop talking, that means stop whistling and stop acting like an idiot!!”
Kids today are using their cell phones to record all kinds of pranks.
“I remember one time in the wrestling room actually, doing a little exercise that was kind of weird- and somebody actually videotaped it and put it on YouTube. So yeah, that was kind of embarrassing,” says Nathaniel, 18.
On sites like You Tube and eBaum’s World there are videos of heinous wrecks, intentional and otherwise. One boy shoots himself in the face with a paintball gun. Another wipes out after attempting a huge jump on his bike.
Underage drinking is also a popular theme. “I’m going to chug a pint of Jack Daniels out of this here beer bong,” announces a boy who’s made a home video from his college dorm room.
Many kids will try anything to become famous on video-sharing websites.
“With 70-thousand videos a day being uploaded to YouTube, it’s kind of hard to stand out,” says Steve Harmon, the Chair of the Division of Learning Technologies at Georgia State University. “So the kids find they have to keep pushing the envelope – to do something more outrageous – to be able to get attention from that.”
He says parents should remind kids that, besides their friends, teachers, employers and college admissions staff might watch their videos.
“Kids don’t have a good sense that what they put on YouTube is public,” says Harmon. “They feel like they are alone in their room with a computer – and so whatever they upload is private.”
And for kids who think they can post embarrassing video of others and remain anonymous?
“It’s really pretty easy to track down who loaded something up to YouTube if you have any sort of sophisticated search mechanism,” explains Harmon, “And even worse than that, though – kids like to talk about what other kids are doing. So in a local setting, even though the kid thinks what they’ve put online is known only to them and their closest friends, all the other kids know about it – and they are going to tell.”
Tips for Parents
The vast majority of teens spend time online. According to a recent Harris Interactive Poll, 72 percent of teens have an online social-networking profile, 73 percent use cell phones and 91 percent have an email address. But what information are they sharing? Consider these statistics:
- 59 percent say posting personal information or photos on public blogs or social-networking sites is “somewhat unsafe” or “very unsafe.”
- 7 percent say posting personal information is “very safe.”
- 34 percent say it’s “somewhat safe.”
- 62 percent say they post photos of themselves.
- 45 percent post the name of their school.
- 4 percent post their address.
- 14 percent post their cell phone number.
Experts say make sure your kids never use their real name or address when posting any material on the Internet. Avoid posting information that would allow a stranger to locate your child. This includes the name of a school or sports team. Also, avoid revealing the city where you live.
Before you buy a video camera, web cam or video phone for your child, take their level of maturity into account. Some children may be too immature to understand the risks involved in posting videos or pictures online. Steve Harmon of Georgia State University also advises it would be difficult to search the web to figure out if your child is posting videos online. There is simply too much content on video-sharing websites. It’s much more productive to talk to your child. Explain the potential downside of posting embarrassing videos online and make sure your kids understand that they lose exclusive control over videos once they are posted on the Internet.
References
- Federal Bureau of Investigation (Innocent Images National Initiative)
- Georgia State University
- Harris Interactive Poll
- i-SAFE America, Internet safety education group
- Wired Safety, an online safety, education and help group
For more on National Cyber Safety Awareness Month visit Examiner.com article.
Tags: Connect with Kids, Cyber Safety, Cyberbullying, Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Teens, Parenting Teens Online, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teen Help
