Sue Scheff: FCATs start today in Florida – Could Facebook and Video Games be the cause of a decline in grades?
by Sue Scheff on Mar 09, 2010
If you live in Florida and have children that attend public school, the FCAT’s (Florida Comprehensive Assessment Test) is part of public school testing. The Florida Comprehensive Assessment Test® (FCAT) is part of Florida’s overall plan to increase student achievement by implementing higher standards. The FCAT, administered to students in Grades 3-11, consists of criterion-referenced tests (CRT) in mathematics, reading, science, and writing, which measure student progress toward meeting the Sunshine State Standards (SSS) benchmarks.
The Sun-Sentinel reports Education experts say the drop-off can be attributed to many things – a progressively more difficult test, students’ backgrounds and a decreased focus on teaching students to read in upper grades.
Then there are the distractions, such as playing video games or connecting with friends on Facebook.
The numbers tell the story. Only four of Broward’s 32 high schools had at least 75 percent of students reading at grade level in the past five years, according to a Sun Sentinel analysis of FCAT reading scores. That’s compared with 98 of 140 elementary and 23 of 41 middle schools.
Overall in Broward, 37 percent of 10th-graders and 57 percent of eighth-graders scored a 3 or higher on last year’s state reading test. Broward’s eighth-graders performed slightly higher than the statewide average of 54 percent, while 10th-graders mirrored the statewide figures.
Parents need to get involved. They need to learn how to set boundaries and simply unplug from the distractions. Struggling students also might have a problem getting motivated to take tests, parents need to encourage their children and help them to understand the importance of education.
Source: Sun-Sentinel
Be an educated parent, you will have successful teens!
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Tags: Educational Testing, FCAT, parenting advice, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Study Skills, Sue Scheff, Teachers, Teen Help
Sue Scheff: Sexual Assault Awareness Week – Be An Educated Parent
by Sue Scheff on Feb 18, 2010
Sexual Assault Awareness Week: February 22-25, 2010
Sponsored by Georgia Southern University’s Sexual Assault Response Team (SART) and the Sexual Assault Prevention Advocates (SAPA)
Sadly this is a subject that all parents need to be aware of and their teens need to be educated on. Teen sexual abuse is not prejudice. Whether you believe in a very safe area, or go to an excellent school or college, learning about sexual assault and abuse is a difficult topic but necessary to learn about.
Joni Poole, currently 18 years old, is a survivor of a sexual assault and rape. She is a hero and a voice for those that are suffering silently. She testified against her rapist and put him away. Joni Poole created Sexual Abuse, Assault and Rape Awareness (S.A.A.R.A.) organization following her horrific experiences. She was also featured in my Teens That Inspire series.
Joni Poole has been invited to be the guest speaker for Sexual Assault Prevention Advocates on Thursday 7:30 pm, February 25th, 2009 at Russell Union Rotunda at Georgia Southern University. Learn more.
Some stunning statistics from S.A.A.R.A.:
General Information about Sexual Crime Victims
-1 out of 3 girls are victims or will become victims of a sexual crime before the age of 18.
-1 out of 5 boys are victims or will become victims of a sexual crime before the age of 18.
-80% of young adults who were abused as children, met the diagnostic criteria for at least one psychiatric disorder by age 21
-34% of Sexual Crimes involve a family member or caregiver.
-1.3 forcible rape of adult women every minute. (In America)
-78 women are rape every hour. (In America)
-1,871 women are raped every day. (In America)
Sexual Crime and The Legal System
-72% of Sexual Crimes go unreported.
-If the crime is reported, there is a 50.8% chance of an arrest.
-If there is an arrest, there is an 80% chance of a prosecution.
-If a case makes it to prosecution, there is only a 58% chance of a felony conviction.
-If there is a felony conviction, there is only a 69% chance that the offender will spend time in jail.
-1 out of 20 offenders spend time in jail
-19 out of 20 offenders will walk free
-68% of Rapes occur between the hours of 6 p.m. and 6 a.m.
Not convince yet you need to learn more?
Sexually Abused Children and Crime Rate
-Abused children are 59% more likely to be arrested as a juvenile
-Abused children are 28% more likely to be arrested as an adult
-Abused children are 30% more likely to commit a violent crime
-Over 14% of males in U.S. prisons were abused as children
-Over 36% of females in U.S. prisons were abused as children
See more shocking statistics here.
Be an educated parent, you will have safer teens.
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Tags: Joni Poole, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Assault, Teen Dating Abuse, Teen Help, Teen Issues
Sue Scheff: Teen and Childhood Obesity
by Sue Scheff on Feb 12, 2010
The headlines over the past week have been about the weight of our children. It is important that we teach our children healthy eating habits while they are young. It can be difficult with the high speed of life and always on the go- that Happy Meal is just easier! Sadly in a lot of cases, also cheaper than buying healthy food.
Source: Connect with Kids
Larger Portions
“If you are overweight as a child, or obese as a child, you have a 90% likelihood that you will be overweight or obese as an adult.”
– Rachel Brandeis, registered dietician
While the CDC reports that obesity among American kids has leveled off, fully a third of our children are overweight or obese. Among the reasons for this epidemic is this: both children and adults have forgotten something they knew when they were born.
Five-year-old Emma McCurdy sits at the kitchen table counting her goldfish crackers.
“22, 23, 24, 25,” she says aloud.
“Can you eat 25 goldfish?” asks her mother, Maura McCurdy.
It’s difficult for most parents to know just how much their kids can, or should, eat.
McCurdy agrees: “You don’t. And that’s really hard.”
It’s even more difficult when everywhere we go, portion sizes are getting bigger and bigger. Fast-food restaurants offer to “super-size” everything from French fries to sodas. In fact, studies show that restaurant portions exceed recommended portion sizes by as much as 800%. And the more our kids are served, the more they eat and the bigger they get, which sets them up for lifelong health problems.
“If you are overweight as a child, or obese as a child, you have a 90% likelihood that you will be overweight or obese as an adult,” warns Rachel Brandeis, a registered dietician.
Babies are born with an innate ability to stop eating when they’re full, but that instinct gradually fades, especially in the face of huge portions and their parents’ demands.
Brandeis says that we need to help kids maintain that instinct.
“A lot of times, what we want to do is have our children clean their plate. We think that’s the way to proper nutrition, when in reality, what we really want to be able to teach our children is to self-regulate their food intake,” she says.
One way to help is to serve reasonable portions at home. But what is a reasonable serving?
“Usually, a good rule of thumb for portion sizes for a toddler is 1 year of age equals a tablespoon,” Brandeis says.
So, for a 2-year-old, that means two tablespoons of vegetables, two of meat and two of fruit. If parents serve those portions and allow their kids to decide when to stop eating, when they get to be Emma’s age, they eat because they’re hungry, not just because it’s there.
Maura agrees: “I think they’re kind of smart. They eat when they’re hungry. We should probably pay more attention to them rather than say, ‘Clean your plate, clean your plate, clean your plate.’”
Researchers suggest that ever-larger food portion sizes, both inside and outside the home, correlate to a sharp rise in American waistlines and may be partially to blame for the rising numbers of overweight and obesity cases in the United States over the past 30 years. Researchers from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, who analyzed survey data of 63,000 people aged 2 and older, found that portion sizes increased for nearly all home-cooked and restaurant-prepared meals between 1977 and 1998. In fact, the size of an average soft drink is now 20 fluid ounces and 193 calories, compared to 13 fluid ounces and 144 calories nearly three decades ago. Consider these additional findings from the study:
- The average cheeseburger grew from 5.8 ounces to 7.3 ounces, swelling from 397 to 533 calories.
- Salty snacks grew from 1 ounce to 1.6 ounces, climbing from 132 calories to 225 calories.
- Pizza was the only food that did not increase in size or calories between the late 1970s and the mid-1990s, and portions actually decreased in size.
- The largest portion sizes were found in fast-food restaurants between 1994 and 1998, but for desserts, hamburgers and cheeseburgers, the largest portion sizes were actually dished out at home.
Tips for Parents
Children who are overweight are at an increased risk of developing type 2 diabetes as well as these additional health complications:
- Cardiovascular problems
- Orthopaedic abnormalities
- Gout
- Arthritis
- Skin conditions
- Obstructive sleep apnea and respiratory problems
Being overweight also is likely to negatively affect a child’s social and psychological development, and it has been linked to the premature onset of puberty. Moreover, the health threats posed by being obese in early childhood can be long lasting, with overweight adolescents at greatest risk of becoming overweight adults. Given the seriousness of the health consequences associated with being overweight, and the rate of increase in the past few decades, the U.S. Surgeon General has declared overweight prevalence in children and adolescents “a major public health concern.”
Variety in food choices is a key ingredient in helping children to establish healthy eating habits. Consider trying these additional tips, published in the Journal of the American Dietetic Association, for helping you and your child maintain healthy, balanced diets:
- Go family style. Adults and children do better at controlling portion sizes when they serve themselves. Children as young as 3 can serve themselves. The dinner table should not be a battleground. As a parent, you are responsible for bringing in healthy food and putting it on the table.
- Talk to your child so he or she can learn from his or her own body how much to eat and to stop eating when he or she is full.
- Instead of forbidding your child to eat sweets, provide him or her with nutritious foods first. Stopping your child from snacking just before dinner is wrong if he or she is munching on healthy foods.
- Be aware of portion sizes. At home, start with reasonable serving sizes and keep food for second helpings in the kitchen, not at the dinner table. When your family is eating out, ensure that your child doesn’t feel like he or she has to finish everything on his or her plate.
- Get out of the habit of having a lot of food for not a lot of money. It is something that fast-food providers get you to think about. This practice is really not good value in the long run. It is better to make a decision to go for smaller portions.
References
- Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
- Child Trends DataBank
- Journal of the American Dietetic Association
- Journal of the American Medical Association
- U.S. Department of Agriculture
- U.S. Surgeon General
Tags: Childhood Obesity, Overeating, parenting advice, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teen Help, Teen Obesity
Sue Scheff: The F-Word in Florida Education
by Sue Scheff on Feb 10, 2010
Every February, parents and students alike cringe when they hear that dreaded four-letter word – FCAT.
What exactly is the FCAT? According tot he Florida Department of Education, the Florida Comprehensive Assessment Test, or FCAT, is part of the state’s overall place to increase student achievement by implementing higher standards. The FCAT, administered to students in Grades 3-11, consists of criterion-referenced tests (CRT) in mathematics, reading, science, and writing, which measure student progress toward meeting the Sunshine State Standards (SSS) benchmarks.
Because the state uses the results for a variety of purposes, including student retention and school funding, a great deal of emphasis is placed on the FCAT. This can be quite stressful for both the children and the parents.
Some tips were supplied by Weston teachers and school counselors in Our City Weston.
- Practice makes perfect. It is beneficial for parents to provide an opportunity for daily FCAT practice.
- Consider tutoring. If your child needs extra help, take advantage of after-school tutoring and Saturday FCAT camps. Ask your schools about the times.
- Encourage “active reading.” This means reading with a pen or pencil in hand. Use your Post-It notes to designate spots you need to review or that need attention.
- Find the “proof.” Encourage your children to find the proof that answers are correct. Referring to text for textual support.
- Don’t skip school. Emphasize good attendance and punctuality for your child.
- Read test questions carefully.
- Instill confidence. According to the American School Counselor Association the most important thing a parent can do is encourage their child to do his or her best. Tell them you are proud of them.
February 9-11th the FCAT Writes exam starts. The reading, math and science exams start on March 9-19th. For more information visit Florida Dept of Education.
Being an educated parent will help you have prepared children!
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Tags: Education, FCAT, Florida Education, Parenting, parenting advice, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff
Sue Scheff: Saying “I Love You” to Your Teen at Valentine’s
by Sue Scheff on Feb 09, 2010
Your elementary children have probably picked out their favorite Disney or cartoon characters for their V-Day parties in school.
What about a teenager? Raising teens is not the easiest job and some teenagers are extremely difficult. Valentine’s Day can give a parent an opportunity to let their teen know just how much you do love them, even if they give you stress and angst at times.
- Plan some time together. Cook their favorite meal or go to their favorite restaurant. The important thing is you are taking the time to spend it with them. What a great opportunity to open those lines of communication.
- If they have special plans with a girlfriend or boyfriend, be sure to make a date on another night to celebrate. Let your teen know they are important to you, how much you do love them no matter what and you understand that they may want to spend Valentine’s Day with their significant other, however you would like a rain check. (Make the plans as near February 14th as possible so the understand it is a special time for parents and teens too).
- If they do have a significant other they want to take to dinner, you may want to give them a Valentine’s card with a gift certificate to a restaurant for them. This way you are showing your teenager you respect their decision and also want to spend them with them after or before they have their date.
- We all know it is almost impossible to buy for teens, and Valentine’s Day is about expressing love – do it with your time. It is a priceless gift.
Happy Valentine’s Day and make it special for your teenager and family.
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Tags: I Love You, Parenting, parenting advice, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Valentine Gifts for Teens, Valentine's Day
Sue Scheff: Getting Teacher Recommendations for Your Teen’s College Applications
by Sue Scheff on Feb 01, 2010
As your High School Juniors and Seniors prepare to apply to colleges, getting teacher recommendations is usually part of the process. Today colleges have become competitive and more selective on their applicants. Many college recruiters are using search engines to research their applicant, however the old-fashion teacher recommendations are also an asset. Here is a great article to help parents and teens to better understand this process.
Source: Connect with Kids
Teacher Recommendations
“I only see a few (recommendation letters) that are really specifically negative, but a few are less than positive. That’s the best way I can put it. Where they say, ‘Well, this student may be strong in this area in the future,’ or, ‘They have a lot of potential.’”
– David Graves, Associate Director of Admissions, University of Georgia
Across the country, high school seniors are in the midst of applying to college. One important factor is a recommendation from a teacher – a task that is not always without risk.
“I only see a few that are really specifically negative, but a few are less than positive,” says David Graves, associate director of admissions at the University of Georgia. “That’s the best way I can put it. Where they say, ‘Well, this student may be strong in this area in the future,’ or, ‘They have a lot of potential.’”
He says “a lot of potential” is one of those phrases that shows a teacher has reservations.
“They might say something like, ‘They turn in all their information on time,’” he adds. “Well, I expect that from everybody pretty much, so just having that as their best praise isn’t much of a praise.”
Another risk is that letters can be so vague as to become meaningless.
“That doesn’t give me any insight if its just a run-of-the-mill ‘here’s my formula’ recommendation letter,” says Graves.
His advice? Students should ask the teacher directly if they would give a positive review.
“Just say, ‘How do you feel I’ve done in your class?’” suggests Graves.
“If you are really having doubts, I would probably reconsider asking that teacher,” says Afrooz, a high school senior at Atlanta International School.
Also, kids should choose a teacher who can be specific about their skills and efforts in the classroom.
“I felt like I wanted teachers who knew me,” says Eva, 18, “not just as a strong student, but as a person.”
Another tip is to find the right teacher. A good choice is a math or English teacher from junior year.
“It might be a teacher that teaches, you know, driver’s ed,” says Graves. “And that’s not going to matter that much to me what the driver’s ed teacher says.”
Finally, he says, ask for the letter at least a month in advance.
“I think I asked for my letter about two or three months before it was due,” says senior Graham, “just to make sure that they had time.”
“I was kind of late so I kind of had to do a little begging,” says classmate Rodrigo.
Experts advise students to get to know their guidance counselor as well, because many universities require the counselor to fill out an evaluation form.
Students once allowed the luxury of “finding themselves” now fear that without serious direction early in high school, their future may be lost. What they may lose instead is their childhood.
College enrollment has increased nearly 20% since 1985 and almost tripled from a generation ago. With competition for specific schools fiercer than ever, high school freshmen hoping to go to a choice school are told they may already be behind in the race to build a college résumé.
“I guess in middle school they start emphasizing they’re like, OK, you gotta start getting good grades ’cause colleges will look back even at your eighth-grade year if you’re on the brink of getting in or not getting in,” 17-year-old Sharyn says.
However, good grades may only get them past the first cut. Then, it’s outside activities like volunteer work or special clubs that factor in as much as 40% by some colleges.
Says 17-year-old Andrew: “Sometimes, I find that I take too many things at once – track, academic, math team … I mean, it’s really time consuming.”
Experts say parents of these pressurized kids need to look closely for signs of too much stress and urge them to ease up.
Tips for Parents
It’s one of the most difficult and important decisions your child will make in his or her young adult life. And no parent of a high school junior or senior needs reminding of the pressure that selecting a school brings to his or her child and the entire family.
Recent statistics reveal that it’s also more competitive to enroll in college than years before. Between 1985 and 1995, higher education enrollment increased by 16%, due in part to an increase in female enrollment and the new trend of part-time students. And while experts urge parents to have an open dialogue with their child to deal with the stress, there are a few changes in the process that will make enrolling in a school easier.
More and more schools are turning to the Internet to disperse information, easing the workload on counselors and empowering the curious student. A word of caution: stay with reliable sites or go to a specific college website to verify application deadlines.
Another stress reliever: The trend toward hiring assistance for the essay portion of an application seems to be subsiding. More and more colleges have stated that they are looking for creative responses, even if they are unpolished. And many universities have dropped the essay portion of the application altogether, relying on scores and recommendations to make their decision.
Here are a few starting steps to help you or your child pick the right college or training program:
- Request as much information as possible from the schools on your list, including an application for admission, financial aid and all costs.
- Make a short list of the schools that possess the characteristics for which you are looking.
- Decide if a traditional college is right for you – consider picking up information on community technical schools.
References
- Mapping Your Future
- National Center for Education Statistics
Tags: College application tips, college applications, Connect with Kids, parenting advice, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parenting Tips, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teacher Recommendations, Teen Help
Sue Scheff: Teach Teen Anger Management
by Sue Scheff on Jan 29, 2010
“I don’t care what you say I am doing what I want to do! I hate you and you just don’t want me to have fun!”
“All my friends are allowed to stay out late; you are mean and want to ruin my life!”
“You have no idea how I feel and you are only making it worse!”
When a difficult teen is out of control, they only can hear themselves and what they want. It is usually their way or no way! There are so many factors that can contribute to these feelings. The feelings are very real and should be addressed as soon as you see that your child is starting to run the household. Teen anger may lead to teen rage and teen violence which can soon destroy a family.
A local therapist can help your family diagnosis what is causing the negative behavior patterns. Conduct Disorder or Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD) is some of the many causes to this harmful and stressful behavior. Many times you will find a need for a positive and safe program either local or outside your home are that can help determine where these hurtful outbursts are stemming from.
As difficult as this may seem, it is important that as your teen is expressing these feeling of anger and rage, that you as the parent learn to control your emotions. You don’t want to fuel it or feed it which can potentially enrage it.
Here are some tips for parents to learn to help manage their stress level as their teens is spiraling out of control:
- Take a ‘timeout.‘ Although it may seem cliché, counting to 10 before reacting really can defuse your temper.
- Get some space. Take a break from the person you’re angry with until your frustrations subside a bit.
- Once you’re calm, express your anger. It’s healthy to express your frustration in a nonconfrontational way. Stewing about it can make the situation worse.
- Get some exercise. Physical activity can provide an outlet for your emotions, especially if you’re about to erupt. Go for a brisk walk or a run, swim, lift weights or shoot baskets.
- Think carefully before you say anything. Otherwise, you’re likely to say something you’ll regret. It can be helpful to write down what you want to say so that you can stick to the issues. When you’re angry, it’s easy to get sidetracked.
- Identify solutions to the situation. Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work with the person who angered you to resolve the issue at hand.
- Use ‘I’ statements when describing the problem. This will help you to avoid criticizing or placing blame, which can make the other person angry or resentful – and increase tension. For instance, say, “I’m upset you didn’t help with the housework this evening,” instead of, “You should have helped with the housework.”
- Don’t hold a grudge. If you can forgive the other person, it will help you both. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want.
- Use humor to release tensions. Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Don’t use sarcasm, though – it’s can hurt feelings and make things worse.
- Practice relaxation skills. Learning skills to relax and de-stress can also help control your temper when it may flare up. Practice deep-breathing exercises, visualize a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself, such as “Take it easy.” Other proven ways to ease anger include listening to music, writing in a journal and doing yoga.
These tips from the Mayo Clinic can also be helpful to your teens. It could benefit you to sit down with your teens and talk about controlling rage and anger before it escalates to the boiling over point.
Be an educated parent, you will have safer and healthier teens.
Read more on Examiner.
Tags: Anger Management, parenting advice, Parenting Blogs, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teen Anger, Teen Help, Teen Issues, Teen Rage, Teen Stress
Sue Scheff: Sexual Harassment in a Teens Workplace
by Sue Scheff on Jan 25, 2010
Sexual harassment in the workplace is unacceptable. When you hear about it happening with teenagers it is more deplorable. Who is responsible for your teen’s safety when they go to their job?
Recently 20/20 ABC News reported on this disturbing subject. Sexual Harassment Policy Expert, Susan Strauss, says the problem is especially prevalent in fast food restaurants where so many teenagers have their first jobs.
“They’re vulnerable, they’re young, they’re new to the workforce,” Strauss said of the teenage employees.
What is sexual harassment?
Sexual harassment is unwanted sexual behavior. It may take different forms, including:
- Physical contact, like grabbing, pinching, touching your breast or butt or other body parts, or kissing you against your will;
- Sexual comments, like name-calling (slut, whore, fag), starting rumors about you, making sexual jokes at your expense, or making sexual gestures at or about you;
- Sexual propositions, like asking you for sex or repeatedly asking you out when you have said no;
- Unwanted communication, like phone calls, letters, or e-mails. These can be mean, nasty, or threatening, or they can seem flattering or nice but still make you uncomfortable.
These are only examples; there may be other forms of behavior that are not listed here but still can be considered sexual harassment.
Both the harasser and the victim can be either male or female, and they do not have to be the opposite sex. The harasser can be another teenager or an adult.
Reference: Teen Victim Project
- 81 percent of students will experience some form of sexual harassment at some time while they are in school, with 27 percent experiencing it often.
- 85 percent of students report that students harass other students at their schools.
- Almost 40 percent of students report that teachers and other school employees sexually harass students in their schools.
Do you suspect your teen is being harassed at their employment? Whether you answer “yes” or “no“ you have to take the time to discuss this subject with them. They need to understand even if they are not strong enough to say “no” to sexual advances or afraid to say “no“, it is wrong and they can tell someone.
Sexual harassment is not limited to just workplaces, it could be in school, youth groups, or any situation that involves a person that is less than ethical. This information is not to alarm as much as it is to bring an awareness to parents.
According to a recent study in Maine, one in three high school students reported unwanted sexual advances in the workplace.
Be an educated parent, you will have a safer teen.
Watch video and read more.
Tags: Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Teens, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Assault, Sexual Harassment, Sue Scheff, Teen Help, Teen Sexual Harassment
Sue Scheff: How to Cope When Your Kids Grow Up Too Fast
by Sue Scheff on Jan 20, 2010
Parenting, parenting and more parenting. As much as we rush through our days to get to all the activities, school, homework and more, it seems like it was only yesterday we were changing diapers or teaching our child to ride a bike. Today’s generation has new issues and trying times as well as keeping up with parenting, we have to keep up with technology and so much more.
Guest writer, Nancy Simmons, wrote an excellent article on - How to Cope When Your Kids Grow Up to Fast, and has asked me to share it. It offfered educational and informational tips for you!
How to Cope When Your Kids Grow Up Too Fast
By Nancy Simmons
It’s a tough job being a parent – there are no rules or policies and you have to follow your heart at times and your head at others. And with today’s kids, it’s very difficult to do the right thing because they don’t seem like children at all, even though they’ve barely lived 10 years. They’re growing up faster than they should – not their bodies, but their brains, mentality, and emotional psyche. They know much more than they should, and they’re quick to learn and absorb; and even though this is a good thing when it comes to positive aspects like knowledge, technology and learning, when it comes to areas that are shaded in gray like sex, drugs, alcohol, violence, pregnancy and abortion, parents have no clue as to how to deal with the amount of information (some of it that’s not right too) that their children know.
We grew up in a different world, one where television and movies were toned down and where there was no Internet. Getting information today is as easy as pie – the Internet tells you just about anything you want to know. Children as young as 10 and 11 want to wear makeup, drink and be sexually active, just because their friends are doing it and they don’t want to be left out. And coping with them without alienating them is a tough task, one that parents would find easier if they:
- Stay in tune with their children’s lives: As a parent, you must know what your child is up to, who their friends are, and what’s going on in their minds. That’s not to say that you must snoop around their stuff or do things behind their back, but it’s a good idea to watch their behavior as they grow and check for signs of change as they cross the age of 10. That’s when they are likely to be influenced by their peers and tempted to try forbidden things. You certainly don’t want your preteen experimenting with sex or drugs just because they think it’s cool, with you being left in the dark about it.
- Can talk to their children openly: Parent-children relationships work better when there’s a layer of friendship in between the two. When your child seems on the verge of becoming an adult, both mentally and physically, it’s important that they’re able to come to you with all their problems and secrets. This is possible only if you keep an open mind and are not quick to judge and condemn. A close friend had sex when she was 13, and later, because she was scared that she was pregnant, she confided in her dad the whole story. He was very understanding and helped her cope with the issue, without once berating or shouting at her. This attitude changed her completely – she became more responsible because of her father’s open and understanding behavior, and today, she’s a balanced and happy adult.
- Learn to draw the line somewhere: Kids today live in an entirely different world from the one you grew up in, so they tend to wear trendier clothes and wear makeup long before you were allowed to do so. Rather than denying them all that they ask for and risk them going behind your back, give in a little regarding issues that are relatively trivial. At the same time, it’s best not to encourage or turn a blind eye to drinking, sexual activity or anything else that could have long-lasting and serious repercussions just because you don’t want conflict with your child.
- Realize that each child is different: You know your child better than anyone else, so use your judgment to deal with sensitive issues according to their temperament and attitude. Don’t follow what your friends or siblings are doing with their children; there’s no guarantee that what works for one child will work for another. The better you’re able to read your child, the more you’ll be able to help them as they grapple with issues that are beyond their understanding.
Children respond better to love and understanding rather than discipline and punishment, so assess each situation and act accordingly instead of blindly following rules.
By-line:
This guest post is contributed by Nancy Simmons, who writes on the topic of online science degree . She welcomes your comments at her email address: nancy.simmons09@gmail.com .
Thank you, Nancy, for sharing this valuable information.
Tags: Parenting, parenting advice, Parenting Kids, Parenting Resources, Parenting Teens, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Teen Health, Teen Help, Teen Issues
Sue Scheff: Teens Going Green and their tips!
by Sue Scheff on Jan 18, 2010
Today many are concerned about the earth and global warming. Many people participate in recycling and re-using shopping bags as well as other ways to conserve energy. Teaching our children while they are young will help them continue to preserve our environment.
Today’s teens are more wired up, plugged in, worldly and savvy than ever. Many care deeply about the threats facing our environment, and are committed to making difference. But it’s not always easy to know exactly what to do. Here are some suggestions to get started:
- When You’re Done Surfing and IMing, Turn Your Computer Off. If you shut your machine off before bedtime, you’ll save an average of $90 worth of electricity a year – tell your parents that, and ask for a raise in your allowance! If you must leave your computer on, tell it to go into “sleep” or “hibernate” mode, which saves power. Save even more juice by unplugging your computer (or flip the switch on a surge protector) to stop the “phantom load” problem.
- Put Together a Cool Vintage Outfit. Impress your friends with your fab style sense when you show up to a party in a vintage Betsey Johnson number (you can find gently used clothing for a steal at thrift stores and garage sales). Go glam by raiding your parents’ closet for 1970s and ’80s pants, vests and jackets.
- Instead of Insisting on Driving, Catch the School Bus. No, it may not be as cool as driving yourself, but it is a lot safer, according to the National Academies of Science and Engineering. Buses are also much more fuel efficient than cars, saving gas and lowering emissions that cause global warming.
- Get Involved! Most schools have environment or Earth Day clubs, so give them a chance! It’s a great way to meet nice people, and you can learn so much from your peers. Many clubs convince their schools to recycle, start a garden or hold an Earth Day fair.
- Turn Off the Lights Behind You. Remember that riddle about the tree falling in the forest when no one is around? Well, why leave a light on when no one is around? It’s just plain waste. Your parents may even bug you about it because they have to pay the energy bills, and they know lighting accounts for an average of 11% of that total.
- Join the “Virtual March.” Founded by eco-warrior Laurie David, Senator John McCain and Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the Stop Global Warming Virtual March is a Web-based effort to bring people together to take a stand against climate change. So far nearly 900,000 people have joined up to demand that our leaders begin reducing carbon dioxide emissions now.
- Help Lose the Litter. Littering is a blight on our landscape that chokes wildlife and releases toxic chemicals when it breaks down. Plus it’s just plain ugly! Many neighborhoods hold regular cleanups, so volunteer! It’s an easy way to get some exercise while making a difference and meeting new people.
More suggestions –> Continue. Part two.
Source: The Daily Green, Brian Clark Howard
Tags: Eco-Friendly, Going Green Tips, Parenting, parenting advice, Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff, Teens Going Green
